The New Adventures of Pac-Man: The Good, the Bad, and the Baloo
This is a parody of 'The New Adventures of Winnie the Pooh'' episode "The Good, the Bad, and the Tigger". Plot Pac-Man, Baloo, Tech E. Coyote and Porky Pig are at Bart Simpson’s house and are playing with his model train set. Baloo wants a turn to run the train, but Bart doesn’t think Baloo is ready yet and mentions that trains are not easy to run. Baloo denies this (stating that “Running trains is what Baloos do the best”); but then wonders where the train’s propeller is. Tech replies and states that trains don’t have propellers, but also point out that it seems to be missing its rudder. Porky comes into the room, steps onto the tracks, and is chased by the train (“Oh d-d-d-dear, oh d-d-d-dear, oh d-d-d-deary-dear”); Pac-Man asks if Porky is enjoying playing with the train. Porky bumps into a small arch made of blocks and falls into the tracks and sees the train heading toward him; but then Marge Simpson calls her son and Bart shuts the train off. Porky stands up and is relieved that he didn’t “get it in the end”; but the train jerks forward and bumps Porky down again (Porky: “I g-g-g-guess I did”). As Bart heads downstairs for lunch, he instructs everyone else to not touch his train until he comes back. Baloo states he’ll keep an eye on everyone and Bart leaves his room. With Bart now gone, Baloo suggests they take his train for “a little ring-a-ding spin”. Porky objects to this, pointing out that something terrible might happen, and suggests that the gang instead go outside and play a nice quiet game called “Guess Who’s Sleeping”. Tech E. Coyote asks how the winner will know he won if he’s asleep; and a sleepy Pac-Man answer that they can tell him when he wakes up. Tech then points out that Pac-Man is taking an unfair head start by trying to go to sleep; and he goes on to state “We all have to be awake to go to sleep; otherwise the person who’s asleep won’t be awake, right?” Tech and Porky walk out of Bart’s room as the discussion progresses; leaving Baloo and Pac-Man alone with the train. Baloo then picks up the controls to the train and tells Pac-Man that it’s their chance to run it; but Pac-Man points out that Bart said not to touch it. Baloo however points out that he’s not touching the “train” but it’s “controls”. Pac-Man adds “Aren’t the controls part of the train?” and Baloo replies “Nah, they don’t even know each other.” Baloo wiggles a control, and then roughly throws the controls on the hard floor (Pac-Man cringes as if Baloo was going to break them); the train starts up ("TOOT TOOT!"). A worried Pac-Man suggests they should introduce the Train and the Controls to each other; and Baloo replies that Bart won’t mind if they borrow the train, especially if he doesn’t find out (Baloo whispers that last part to himself). As Baloo is playing, Pac-Man then notices the train is heading for points in which one direction has the tracks end right after; Pac-Man points this out to Baloo (“I hope the train stops before the train… ‘stops’.”) Seeing what will happen and realizing he can’t “steer” the train, Baloo decides to lay down more tracks for the train to follow (“…maybe I can ‘steer’ the tracks”). Baloo gets more tracks and starts laying them just in time; he lays them toward a wall, up the wall, around and back down the wall, and out of Bart’s room. The train somehow makes it though Baloo’s obstacle and continues along the tracks out of Bart’s room (Baloo: “Hey, where ya’ going? Runaway train! Runaway train!”) Baloo and Pac-Man then leave Bart’s Room to catch the train. A little while later, Tech and Porky come back in Bart’s room; The coyote trips on the tracks leading out as he’s walking in, and then notices the train is gone; Porky also adds that Baloo and Pac-Man are gone as well. Tech remembers how Baloo was talking about touching the train and suspects that he and Pac-Man took it. Porky replies; “No, that can’t be. Pac-Man’s not a train robber, and Baloo’s not a… Pac-Man’s not a train robber. Train robber. Train robber. Train robber…” As Porky continues pondering, we fade from reality into an old western fantasy, and the first thing we see is a life sized version of Bart’s toy train coming out of a tunnel and Baloo (dotting black, western desperado attire) giving chase on foot. Baloo manages to grab onto the caboose, climbs on top, and proceeds to dash along the top of the train cars toward the engine, but bumps into solid rock above a tunnel entrance and lands back in the caboose after sliding off (Baloo is relieved as he states to himself he almost lost his hat). Baloo now makes his way toward the engine by going though the train cars, and hops over the tender and into the cab to find Pac-Man (dotting a black, western hat, a blue neckerchief and black boots) at the controls. He asks Pac-Man how he got there so fast, and Pac-Man answers by pointing out that this is a fantasy. Baloo then takes the controls and attempts to figure out how to run the train; he pulls 3 levers, but it seems to have no effect. Baloo then decides to take a “delicatessen touch”; he grabs a wooden mallet and roughly bangs the controls with it, causing them to go crazy and the train to go wild (Baloo and Pac-Man begin screaming as if they were on a roller coaster). Oggy the Blue Cat (dotting a brown, western hat and vest) then pops up between 2 ties in the tracks wonder what all the commotion is; he sees the train speeding toward him and he immediately screams and scrambles back underground to avoid getting run over. Oggy takes shelter in a tunnel to stay out of the way “until the fools’ rush is over”; suddenly, the train races into the tunnel toward Oggy and he immediately runs for his life, out of the tunnel and off a bridge into a stream of water below. As we see Oggy carried away by the water, we fade into the view of an old western town. We see Tech E. Coyote (dotting western townsfolk attire) calling for help as the train has been stolen and goes to find sheriff Porky Pig (who we see dotting a white Sheriff’s hat, a gold, star shaped Sheriff’s Badge, and white boots). Meanwhile in the train, Baloo (having a wonderful time) checks the firebox and then asks Pac-Man to feed it so that the bear can figure out how to stop the train; Pac-Man agrees and adds that it might like some fruit and power pellets as he knows he would. Back at the Sheriff’s office (Sheriff is misspelled as “SHERUF”), Tech briefs Sheriff Porky on what happened and tells him that the town is depending on him to hunt down desperado Baloo and Pac-Man. He then hands Porky a belt with pouches containing ice cream scoops where small guns would be (ice cream scoops are substituted for guns in this western fantasy). Porky however objects that Pac-Man would never take a train (“…power pellets perhaps, but not a train”); Tech disagrees, stating that “anyone who acts that innocent must not as innocent as he acts.” Colonel Hathi (dotting a sombrero) comes in the room, stating that it’s just another story of a Pac gone bad. Porky then decides to take the job, but states he’ll need some deputies; Hathi states to Tech “guess that means us.” Porky opens a chest containing 2 gold, star shaped badges; he puts one on Tech’s chest, and the other on Hathi’s left flank. We now see the train heading for a station and we see Porky at the platform; he pulls out a long document and unrolls it to read it (it’s so long it goes across the tracks), and begins: “By the power invested in me as Sheriff of this fantasy, I arrest you for train-napping in the 17th Degree, and furthermore…” But before Porky can finish, the train speeds though the station and shreds the document into confetti; Pac-Man sees this and states “Oh look Baloo, Porky’s giving us a Parade.” As the train speeds off, Baloo calls out “Hey Porky old pal, can you help me stop this choo choo?” Meanwhile, Tech is riding Colonel Hathi to catch the train, and is telling the elephant to go faster he claims they are gaining on them; Hathi sarcastically remarks “maybe you’d like to change places for a while”. Right on cue, the train comes zooming past them, spinning them around and literally changing their places (Hathi: “Never mind”). We next see Porky attempting to lasso the train; he manages to get a hold of the caboose, but is only pulled along in mid air as he hangs on to his rope. Porky remarks to himself that lassoing the train perhaps wasn’t such a smart idea; the train then races though the station again, and Porky is left behind on the spout of the train’s water tower. While Tech continues to pursue the train on Hathi (telling him to go faster), Porky (still on the water tower’s spout) sees the train coming and has made a plan to hop aboard on the count of 7. While counting, Pac-Man gives a friendly hello to Porky; the pig replies, slips off the spout, and falls onto a cactus below, leading him to bounce around as he’s poked (Pac-Man: “Oh look, now Porky’s dancing”). Porky, Tech and Hathi now resort to pursuing the train on a railway handcart. They soon reach an incline and begin to gather speed as they coast downward; Tech asks Sheriff Porky how to slow the handcart down. We go back to the train as it follows the tracks into a body of water (with Baloo screaming as if he’s on a roller coaster); the train emerges waterlogged but unharmed and still moving forward on the tracks with the engine's whistle blowing. Baloo wonders what else to do: “I’ve pulled every switch, I’ve switched every pull, and it still won’t stop!” Pac-Man then points out a pedal on the floor and asks Baloo “Did you ‘pull’ this one?” Baloo steps on the Pedal, and the train finally stops suddenly; but the force of the sudden stop jettisons the entire train into the air. Each train car and the engine flips backwards in midair and lands neatly back on the tracks in one peace, with the train cars in the same order as they were before, but with the whole train now facing the other way; and after a brief moment, the train speeds off again. We also see Baloo’s hat blow out of the cab and land on a mail crane alongside the tracks. Meanwhile, the handcart carrying Porky, Tech and Hathi is now speeding out of control, and everyone is screaming in fright and holding on for dear life. Much to their horror, they see their track (which is running high up along the side of a rock formation) is damaged up ahead; and unable to stop, they run off the tracks and plummet down toward another line of tracks on the ground below. The same Oggy from earlier pops up between 2 ties on these tracks and hears Porky and company plummeting toward him; he ponders for a brief moment at what the sound might be, and then looks up and screams in fright as he sees what’s coming at him. The handcart lands neatly on the tracks in one peace and continues speeding along; Oggy was also picked up as the handcart landed (Oggy: “...get me off this thing!”). Meanwhile back in the train, Baloo hastily pulls more levers, and this only makes the train go even faster. Baloo then looks out of the cab and spots his hat on the mail crane from earlier; he reaches out of grab it and succeeds, but gets caught in the noose and is left behind as the train speeds onward with Pac-Man. Pac-Man looks back for a brief moment at Baloo before looking ahead and seeing the handcart carrying Porky and company speeding out of control straight toward him (“Oh Wakka-wakka!!”) as the engine blows its whistle! Everyone screams in fright and covers their eyes as their respective vehicles charge toward each other fit to collide; and then, KABOOM! The explosion jettisons Pac-Man, Porky, Tech, Hathi and Oggy into the air, and we see that the entire train and handcart are all horribly smashed to pieces in the accident. Pac-Man, Porky, Tech and Oggy land on each other, and Hathi bounces off them. Hathi remarks to himself “What do you know: Didn’t get the worst of it”; but then sees airborne parts from the train land right next to him. Everyone gets up, but Porky (despite his faith in his friend) is forced to arrest Pac-Man for train-robbing as he was the only one in the train during the crash. Baloo (still caught in the mail crane) watches from afar in grief as Pac-Man is taken away: “This is terrible, horrible; they ‘The Pac-Man with a name’ is an outlaw. Gasp, they must think I’m an outlaw too. All I did was borrow one eensy-weensy train. Well, at least it’s not a total loss; I got my hat back. Do-ba-dee-doo!” At Sheriff Porky’s office, Pac-Man is put behind bars in a rather unusual jail cell (the bars are not closely spaced enough to prevent someone from walking though them; and there is no back wall, allowing anyone locked behind the bars to simply walk outside into the desert; no one takes notice of this) and is interrogating Pac-Man as to why he took the train. Porky warns Pac-Man that if he doesn’t come up with a good excuse, he will have to have the judge (and mentions the Judge hesitantly); a wave of fear washes over everyone at the mentioning of the judge. Everyone goes into the cell and looks out into the desert at a sinister looking swing set with Oggy (now in different western attire than he was wearing earlier) playing a sinister tune on his harmonica. “And guess who gets to play the Judge” says Oggy as he slaps one of the cockroaches with his fly-swatter. He goes on “Looks like there’s gonna be a ‘swinging’” and laugh’s wickedly. Apparently, “swinging” is this western fantasy’s substitute for the old west’s common punishment of “hanging” (just as ice cream scoops substitute guns), thus making Judge Oggy a “swinging judge”; not understanding this, Pac-Man gleefully comments how wonderful “a swinging” would be as he loves to swing. Porky replies, “Oh d-d-d-dear. T-t-t-this can't go well folks.” Later that night, Baloo tiptoes toward the Sheriff’s office, quietly opens the (ironically lockless) front door, tiptoes past a sleeping Tech, Hathi and Sheriff Porky, grabs the keys to the cell and proceeds to unlock it to set Pac-Man free. Pac-Man (also asleep) wakes up and loudly says hello to Baloo, prompting him to go ironically though the bars to hush Pac-Man; he then walks back out and opens the cell door. Pac-Man however feels that he should stay, but Baloo reminds Pac-Man that he’s innocent and that he was the one who really borrowed the train. Despite Pac-Man adding that he believes he has “one of those guilty faces only a Pac-Mother could love”, Baloo drags him along though the back of the cell where a wall should be and into the desert. Pac-Man stops briefly to say goodbye to Porky; a sleepy Porky bids him goodbye, and then wakes up completely, realizing too late that Pac-Man escaping is bad (“Esca-sca-scaping!? Oh d-d-d-dear!”). The next morning, we find Pac-Man and Baloo walking through the desert and discussing the situation. Baloo mentions to Pac-Man that he should have told Sheriff Porky and company that he had nothing to do with the train napping, and Pac-Man adds they all thought he was guilty and didn’t want to let them down. Baloo goes onto say that he only mean to borrow the train as no one would let him touch it. Pac-Man suggests that he and Baloo turn themselves in, and adds that they could get off to a fresh start after swinging; Pac-Man also mentions (rubbing his tummy) that he wants to collect the reward. Baloo however declines that, stating that although he feels bad, he doesn’t feel that bad; and he states that he and Pac-Man should put their thinking caps on to figure another way out. While thinking, Pac-Man mentions that it’s too bad they can’t fix the train; but Baloo thinks that is a terrific idea (“If we fix the train, we won’t have to turn ourselves in”). Pac-Man and Baloo arrive at the scene of the train wreck and get started (Pac-Man expresses a little uncertainty, stating that he’s never been good with puzzles); after a while, they manage to assemble a rather unusual choo-choo of the runaway engine (among other abnormalities, the smoke stack is behind the cab, the bell is where the smoke stack should be, and the hand pump from the hand cart is sticking out of the cab windows); and Pac-Man adds that they only had to use half the parts. Baloo then takes Pac-Man to hide out, stating that Sheriff Porky and company will find the train, and he and Pac-Man will be “home free”; while they aren’t looking, their train starts up and goes off by itself. Not long afterwards, Pac-Man and Baloo literally bump into Sheriff Porky, who loads his ice creams scoops with strawberry ice cream (held by Hathi) and pulls the scoops on Baloo and Pac-Man (Porky: “Sti-sti-sti-stick ‘em up outlaws, if you p-p-p-p-please. I-I’ve got you c-c-c-c-covered.”); Pac-Man and Baloo put their hands up and surrender. Baloo (walking backwards and not looking at the tracks) then takes everyone to where the train should be, telling them they reassembled the train and left it there for them to find; Tech asks where it is now and Baloo realizes that the train is gone. All Pac-Man can say is that they perhaps misplaced it. Pac-Man and Baloo are taken back to the Sheriff’s office and put behind bars; Baloo begs to be let out as he can’t take it (even though he can walk though the bars, or walk out the back as there is still no wall there). Pac-Man however points out that they only been in the cell for 5 minutes; this clams Baloo down who mentions that it seemed like 6 minutes. Hathi mentions to Pac-Man and Baloo that their life looks even more depressing than his right now, and ads that he never thought he’s hear himself say that. A saddened Sheriff Porky mentions to Pac-Man how disappointed he is in his trusted friend and chokes up; Pac-Man lends Porky his neckerchief as he agrees (“I shouldn’t have done what I did, even if I didn’t know what I did.”) Baloo begs for Sheriff Porky to go easy on Pac-Man, adding “I think he ate too much power pellets and couldn’t help himself.” Tech however states that it’s too late for that and Pac-Man and Baloo are going to get what they deserve, and he points to the sinister looking swing set from earlier, with Judge Oggy playing his harmonica sisterly. “Looks like there’s gonna be a double swinging tonight” adds Judge Oggy, and he laughs wickedly. Pac-Man, still unable to understand states to Baloo “How wonderful. Do you think I could go first?” But Baloo can’t let Pac-Man take that sort of fall for him and loudly confesses to Sheriff Porky that he’s the train-napper and Pac-Man had nothing to do with it. Porky is glad to hear that Pac-Man is innocent, and opens the cell door to let Pac-Man out, come into the cell and hugs Pac-Man. Tech then confronts Oggy and demands to know what happened to the train, adding that it couldn’t have rolled off by itself; but right on cue, the train (having come off the tracks somehow), while blowing its whistle, comes charging toward Judge Oggy and his swing set; Oggy dodges the train just in time, but his swing set is destroyed. The train continues toward the back of the Seriff’s office and everyone runs to get away; they all run outside and the train runs into the Sheriff’s office and destroys it. For some reason, the train is particularly interested in pursuing Porky, and eventually sweeps him up; Porky then hangs onto the cow catcher for dear life as the train continues rampaging though the town. Hathi says that they got to do something to save Porky; Tech concurs and asks who’d like to be the new Sheriff. Baloo however states that he’ll stop the runaway choo choo and rescue Piglet, “dead or alive.” Baloo grabs 2 paint brushes and dips them in some black paint, and proceeds to quickly paint some train tracks on the grown for the train to follow; stating that he “never known a train yet that could resist following tracks”. Baloo is right; after the tracks are finished, the train can’t help but rush over and continuously follow them. Baloo then states that all they need to do is what for the train to run out of stream and stop; they wait a long time (we see the sun go down, come back up, go back down, and come back up again; as well as everyone falling asleep). As Baloo peels a banana, he states that he’d give the train “7 more days tops”, and he then throws the banana peel onto the tracks. Without stopping, the train rushes toward the banana peel and then slips on it, causing to skid sideways and crash off-screen, reducing it to pieces once more. Porky emerges dizzy and his hat damaged, but is otherwise unharmed. Porky thanks Baloo for saving his life and the town, “…even if it took you 2 weeks to do it.” But Tech points out that Baloo is still a train-napper and all the trouble they had gone though could have been avoided if it weren’t for him. Pac-Man however defends Baloo, stating that he only meant to train borrow before it got out of control. Porky however adds that borrowing without permission is bad to, especially if you don’t say ‘please’ and ‘thank you’. Baloo however begs for another chance and promises to hang up his ice cream scoops for good. Porky, Pac-Man, Tech and Hathi huddle up, and decide to let Tigger off this tie with a warning, much to Judge Oggy’s dismay (“And I was all set for a good swinging, dag nabbit!”). We now fade back into reality and find that Pac-Man, Baloo, Tech E. Coyote, Porky Pig and Cornel Hathi (who strangely was not there before the fantasy started) have put Bart Simpson’s train set back the way it was before (the train still intact, unlike in the fantasy), and just in time too as Bart comes back in from lunch. Believing that they didn’t touch his train while he was gone, he gives everyone a change to operate the controls, starting with Baloo as he wanted it so much. But after all Baloo had just been though, he declines this opportunity (saying he’s “trying to cut back”) and suggests they instead go outside and play “guess who’s sleeping”. Tech (who states Pac-Man is cheating again), Porky (who asks if he could borrow a pillow), Pac-Man and Hathi follow. After a brief moment, Bart then runs to catch up with everyone (stating that he wants to play too), and the episode ends. Cast *Pac-Man (from Pac-Man) as Winnie the Pooh *Porky Pig (from Looney Tunes) as Piglet *Baloo (from The Jungle Book) as Tigger *Tech E. Coyote (from Loonatics Unleashed) as Rabbit *Cornel Hathi (from The Jungle Book) as Eeyore *Oggy (from Oggy and the Cockraches) as Gopher *Bart Simpson (from The Simpsons) as Christopher Robin *Marge Simpson (from The Simpsons) as Christopher Robin's mother Quotes *The Good, the Bad, and the Baloo/Quotes Category:The New Adventures of Winnie the Pooh TV Spoofs Category:TV Spoofs Category:Episodes Category:Episode Spoofs